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I recently returned from a week at Walt Disney World in Florida. Truth be told, I wasn’t looking forward to going. I was going to spend a week with 17 other members of my (wife’s) family on a vacation in a very crowded place. I have nothing against family, or my wife’s family, but am an introvert. Being around large groups of people drains my energy, I need time alone to regroup and recharge. I tend to like quiet places and time for solitude on vacation. My vacations in the last couple of years have not been filled with such times and I was even planning a vacation from my vacation to make sure I had the recharging time I needed. Well, surprise, the magic happened. The family agreed that we didn’t need to all be together every day and each of five family units each went their own way during the days. The crowds didn’t bother me too much (even though they were ginormous), and I had a fantastic time. I even took time to reflect and wonder. Here’s what I learned, or relearned during my week in Disney World:

Have a Magical Day. Make every day magical. I grew tired of hearing every Disney World employee say this until I realized that it was up to me to take their advice. So I did.

Celebrate today. This phrase decorated many pins and buttons and various items around Disney. It’s good advice. All we have is this moment. Live in it. Celebrate it, even.

Be a kid again. Rediscover wonder. I realized, after about two days, I was just having fun. I felt like a kid again. I wasn’t worrying about things. I was amazed and enthralled. Too often I let the weight of the world drag me down. This led to…

Escape is necessary…as a break, but dangerous as a lifestyle.

Fantasy is wonderful and required, but I also knew that Disney World wasn’t the real world.

If Disney World, with it’s hundreds of thousands of visitors to a half dozen theme parks and various hotels and resorts every day can keep every single rest room crystal clean and stocked with toilet paper and soap and towels, then why is it so difficult for the local filling station or fast food store to maintain one stall? Why is it so hard for me to keep my bathroom at home clean?

It really is a small world, after all. Given all I saw and all I did all week, my favorite moment was the morning I gave up my seat on the bus to a senior citizen as we boarded the shuttles to a theme park. Then I felt a tug on my shirt and little Japanese girl patted the seat next her. She was pushing her little brother over (the two of them fit in one seat) to make room for me. I bowed and sat down. Smiles all around. Bows and smiles again leaving the bus. I ran into this family four or five more times during the week and each time the smiles were bigger and the bows deeper. I will now learn how to say “thank you” in Japanese.

It’s not necessary to be entertained twenty-four hours a day. Even at Walt Disney World, sometimes all I wanted to do was just sit down and watch the people and world go by, or sit and read my book.

All people, including me, get grumpier, nastier and less friendly in direct proportion to how tired and hungry they are, how many small children they are caring for and how long they have been standing in a line. Preparing for these things ahead of time, makes for a better you and a better world.

Wearing name tags is a universal act of radical hospitality. I had a number of great conversations with Disney “cast members” based on their name tags including a ferry boat captain from Lowell, Massachusetts.

Playtime, nap time, dessert, and staying up late are all good for you in moderation.

Realize that not only theme parks, but the everyday world we live in are both full of illusions.

Family isn’t perfect, but family is important.

Go at your own pace.

Not everything is for everybody. I just can’t do roller coasters and such – I get sick.

Get used to waiting. How you handle waiting correlates to how you handle the ride, not just amusements, but life in general. It’s not about the destination, but the journey.

There’s no way to see it all or do it all or experience it all – at Disney or in your life. So don’t try. It’s all about the choices we make that limit our experience. Go for quality over quantity.

Sometimes “Thank you,” is all that’s necessary even when you feel that “Thank you,” isn’t nearly enough.

So, Thank you to my in-laws who gave us this incredible gift: the plane tickets, the theme park passes, the hotel room, the meal money. It was the gift of a lifetime. Oh yeah, one last thing, the most magical thing of all – Love.

The Leadership Challenge

Here’s a great video of Ron Heifetz of Harvard, author of Leadership without Easy Answers. He’s my favorite thinker on issues of leadership.  I first read about him in Harvard magazine back in the 1990’s and then went and got his book.  I think his idea about breaking down the issues that confront us into adaptive and technical problems is huge.  Adaptive problems are things that confront us that force us to go beyond our current “know how.”  Therefore they require new solutions and new approaches.  Technical problems are solved by doing what we’ve done before, but bigger, faster, stronger, etc.

Our culture also confuses leadership and authority.  Leadership, Heifetz argues, is finding adaptive solutions and this requires change.  In congregations, change meets resistance. Authority is power granted to perform a service. For example, we cede the Post Office the authority to set the price of stamps because we get the service of having our mail, more or less, delivered to our door every single day.  We cede the minister authority over worship services because we have a worship service every Sunday.  When someone exercises the power of an authority but doesn’t provide the service, that’s authoritarianism.

Heifetz argues that the big leadership failure is people in “authority” keep throwing technical solutions at adaptive challenges and wonder why nothing works, and people in society or congregations keep wondering why nothing is working while at the same time many people wonder why the “leaders” aren’t fixing things and everyone is frustrated.  Real leadership is, in a sense, getting things done.  You don’t need a title or a position or an office, you just need to do the adaptive work.  If things need cleaning, clean them. If money needs raising, raise it. If people need bringing together, bring them together, organize.  Sounds easy, but the challenges in these areas may be adaptive, not technical.  There may also be people in the way who hold positions of authority (and power) who are threatened by people who are getting results by performing the adaptive work, and thus becoming “leaders,” and causing others to lose interest and trust in the old authority (and power) structures.  The people getting the adaptive work done then become the new leaders (and authorities) and this causes a crisis in “leadership.”

Another challenge to this situation is that many organizations do not discuss the nature of leadership so when this dynamic occurs, resentment builds up, and no one is sure who is responsible for what, who is “in charge” and some people feel like others are not “doing their jobs.”

Here’s Heifetz on some of the basics:

Attitudes of Gratitude

We practice theme-based ministry at Pathways and November’s theme has been gratitude (thanksgiving, appreciation). Doing my best to practice what I preach, walk the talk and  do some pastoral modeling, I have engaged the spiritual practice of gratitude in earnest since November the first.  It has been an engaging experience.  Like all spiritual practices approached with honesty and openness, intentionality, repetition and depth, my engagement with gratitude has taken me places I never would have imagined when I began.

First of all, gratitude seems like such a positive thing. Gratitude is a no-brainer theological concept for a month containing the holiday of Thanksgiving, right? Yet, like the holiday season itself, my spiritual practice of gratitude has had it’s darker, shadow side – or rather revealed my darker shadow side and forced me to grapple with it.  During the weeks while I have been preaching and teaching gratitude, I have encountered two periods where I experienced a couple of stretches – a few days at a time each – that contained more than their share of expressions of ingratitude aimed at me.  Whoa!  OK. Here we go. Don’t take it personally. Or try not to take it personally. What can I be thankful for here? What can I learn? Geez this sucks. OK. I am grateful this isn’t worse, and so on getting back on track.  Then I noticed how my practice of gratitude and my attention to cultivating thankfulness and appreciation helped me right the ingratitude ship and not get knocked down by what was some pretty hefty negativity.  Like all practices, gratitude helps you more, the more you practice. I’ve benefited a little bit for my little bit of practice this month and I’m eager to see how much more this practice can enhance the rest of my spiritual life and my life in general.  It’s good ministry and it’s just a plain good way to be.

I’ve also noticed that gratitude pays itself forward like random acts of kindness intentionally committed.  The more I talk about gratitude, the more others do as well.  I’ve received thank you notes for sermons (indeed! how about that?!), gifts left on my desk at the church office, more people are mentioning things they appreciate about me, the church, my ministry, dropping notes, and this is great, but it’s all reciprocal as I have been very conscious during the last month to say thank you, tell people I appreciate them and how grateful I am for what they do. No blowing smoke, no false praises, but trying to remember not to let things go and not forgetting to remember to tell people their contributions are valued and they are valued and what they mean to me.  At first it was a bit of an exercise and I was ashamed that I noticed it took some effort. Do I really not do this enough? Do we all really not do this enough? I guess so. Well, another lesson learned. I suppose that’s why it’s called a spiritual practice.

I also made it a habit during November of giving thanks for something every morning during my sitting meditation and posting something for which I was thankful as my status update on facebook.  This was a personal exercise, another change of habit exercise, if you will, to train my attention to be more focused on appreciation. I’ve noticed it has resulted in an appreciation contagion.  Over the last week or two, I’ve noticed more and more friends on facebook starting to post status updates making note of things for which they are thankful.  I don’t know if I am responsible for this or not. If I am, that’s great. If I’m not, that’s perfectly fine because my practice has made me wake up and notice that others do this and for that, I’m grateful. It’s probably a better gift in the second instance.

I’ve also noticed that even in terms of social justice issues, and social justice is a particular passion of mine, I’ve moved in the last month from trumpeting and sounding siren calls to giving thanks for those that do the hard work.

All around, as I close in on Thanksgiving I am realizing that I probably won’t be able to keep up the intense focused practice of gratitude that I have engaged in the past three weeks, but if I can carry one of them forward that will be great personal progress. I have made a forward looking commitment to doing this again next year with the intention of making it a yearly practice. To borrow another holiday tradition – Gratitude has done me good, will do me good and I say God bless it!

I will admit to the bit of pride I felt when learning that this blog had once again made the Blog Roundup of UU World Magazine for my comments on last issue’s cover story on the Gospel of inclusion.

Here’s my original post.

Here’s what UU World noted about my post:

The Rev. Tony Lorenzen at “Sunflower Chalice” thought everyone should be exposed to the story of “The Gospel of Inclusion,” our Fall cover story. “The first lesson is that of Universalism. It’s a grand lesson to revisit for Unitarian Universalists and a great idea for non-UUs to be introduced to for the first time. A loving God doesn’t send people to hell. . . . The second is the point made by Rev. [Rosemary Bray] McNatt at the Berry Street Lecture (and I paraphrase): UU Culture is keeping us from being multicultural.” (September 8).

Yay me.

 

 

Really, sometimes I don’t know jack, or just feel like I don’t know Jack. When I feel like this,  I re-read something by Jack – Jack Mendelsohn.  This passage is from Jack Mendelsohn’s book Why I am a Unitarian Universalist.  I underlined it in my copy the first time I read it.  I had it read at my installation. About a month and a half ago, a friend emailed it to me to lift my spirits not knowing, or perhaps indeed knowing it was and is my constant meditation on why I do what I do.  I do know Jack, at least a little bit anyway. He was kind enough to have to me to his house one day while I was an intern minister in Massachusetts.  Still, I don’t know Jack, like I don’t know jack.  That’s the point, I guess.  The ministry isn’t about what you know, it’s about showing up, being present, and giving it your best shot in a world that is full of holiness while many people and things try to convince you otherwise.

Who is a Unitarian Universalist minister?

A person who is never completely satisfied or satisfiable, never completely adjusted or adjustable, who walks in two worlds—one of things as they are, the other of things as they ought to be—and loves them both.

A UU minister is a person with a pincushion soul and an elastic heart, who sits with the happy and the sad in a chaotic pattern of laugh, cry, laugh, cry—and who knows deep down that the first time the laughter is false, or the tears are make-believe, his or her days as a real minister are over.

UU ministers have dreams they can never wholly share, partly because they have some doubts about those dreams themselves and partly because they are unable adequately to explain, describe, or define what it is they think they see and understand.

A UU minister continually runs out of time, out of wisdom, out of ability, out of courage, and out of money.  A UU minister is hurtable, with great responsibility and little power, who must learn to accept people where they are and go on from there.  UU ministers who are worth their salt know all this, and are still thankful every day for the privilege of being what they are.

The future of the liberal church is almost totally dependent on two factors: great congregations (whether large or small) and skilled, effective, dedicated ministers.  The strangest feature of their
relationship is that they create one another.

-Jack Mendelsohn

A Random Act of Kindness

I stopped by a grocery store yesterday to pick up some oranges and some orange candy for a skit I’m doing this Sunday during our Common Ground worship service (wouldn’t you like to know – you’ll have to come by Pathways or wait for the sermon and video).  Anyway, while I was inside the store a random stranger made my day by leaving this note under my windshield wiper in a random act of kindness:

dearyou2

I drive a Honda Civic hybrid.  Ever since I started driving, I’ve had a love for bumper stickers and my partner Tina does not.  A colleague once referred to my last vehicle, also a Honda Civic, as a “billboard on wheels.”  When we moved to Texas about a year ago, I was hesitant to put stickers on the new car, so a friend suggested magnets instead. I bought magnets at a craft store and stuck the bumper stickers to the magnets and put the magnetized stickers on the car.  I was more than a little nervous last fall driving around with my Obama-Biden magnet (an actual magnet from the campaign) in a very, very red Texas county as well as stickers for the human rights campaign ( the = )and other gay rights or equality magnets or stickers, my church at Pathways, and a UU magnet and lately ones that reads “Pro Faith, Pro Family, Pro Choice” that I picked up at our UUA General Assembly last June in Salt Lake City.  I’ve never had any bad reactions or incidents as a result from wearing my opinions on my bumper in Texas, opinions that run counter to the majority here, but I am quite pleasantly surprised that the first reaction I received from them was a positive one. I’m also happy that I’ve chosen to wear these magnets on my car because one of the reasons for doing so is to let people who think like me know they are not alone and as the note proves, I’ve done that in at least one case.

Thanks for letting me know you’re out there, too, whoever you are.

The source of the phrase “There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics,” is unknown although American author Mark Twain and British Prime Minister Benjamin Disraeli, among others have been cited. Wikepedia has a nice entry on the phrase itself for anyone interested.  I think the phrase needs a revival, just in terms of its use as applied to discussions about health care reform.  No matter what one’s opinion on how to, or even if the country should reform our health care system, somewhere in their argument you most likely find statistics.  These statistics will be assumed to be false by people holding an opposite opinion, even if the statistics point to some truth that ought to be considered in our national discussion.

Yesterday, the Senate Finance Committee rejected not one, but two proposals by votes of 15-8 and 13-10 to put a Public Health Insurance Option into legislation under consideration. Their reasoning: a government run plan would pose too much of a threat and too much competition to the private sector.  Say what?

All I could think of was the phrase “Lies, Damn Lies…” and this cartoon:

publicoptioncartoon

The claim that a public health insurance option will ruin private insurance is bogus.  It’s a smoke screen and a straight out lie to allow for-profit insurance companies to keep a monopoly on an industry that is completely broken and puts profit above people’s needs.  The people who would most benefit from a public insurance option are people least likely to vote and show up at town hall type meetings, because they are too busy working to keep a roof over their heads and so resigned to a government and a society that won’t help them and doesn’t care about them that they don’t spend what little time they do have to themselves fighting corporations such as health insurance companies.

Take note of this report on NPR (a public media outlet that hasn’t put private media out of business):

Of the 100 congressional districts with the highest percentage rates of uninsured people, 53 are represented either by Republican lawmakers who are fighting the overhaul, or by conservative Blue Dog Democrats who have slowed down and diluted the overhaul proposals.

One leader of the Blue Dog effort is Rep. Mike Ross of Arkansas, the coalition’s chief health care negotiator. His 4th Congressional District covers southern Arkansas, a rural area with a high poverty rate. In his district, more than one out of five residents under age 65 lacks health insurance. That’s 30 percent higher than the national average.

Health care proposals from the White House and House Democratic leaders aim to help the uninsured in several ways. One possibility is a “public option” — that is, a government-run insurance plan that would compete with private insurers. It would be financially self-sustaining, while giving the uninsured a low-priced alternative to the private companies, and shaking up the near-monopoly that insurance companies enjoy in places like rural Arkansas.

But in June, Ross and the Blue Dog Coalition held up the House bill for two weeks. They wanted the measure to promote co-ops instead of a public option, an approach that more liberal lawmakers dismiss as unworkable.

In his public appearances, Ross speaks passionately about the need for a health care overhaul. Last month, he told a town hall meeting in Arkadelphia, Ark., “I was negotiating 10 hours a day with everybody from the president to the speaker to the majority leader to the chairman of the committee. I wasn’t negotiating to kill the bill. I was negotiating to give us the kind of common sense health care reform that we need and that reflects Arkansas values.”

The meeting was a chance for Ross’ constituents to be heard. It ran well over the two-hour time limit, but mostly, there was only the familiar bickering about illegal immigrants and the role of government. Just three people without insurance asked questions.

“Many of those individuals who would need a public health care option are those who are not likely to be able to take two hours out of their day to go to a public event like that town hall,” says Kevin Motl, a history professor at Ouachita Baptist University who attended the meeting. “They were too busy earning hourly wages and trying to keep roofs above their children’s heads. Those voices are not going to be present in that discourse.”

Why has the Sunflower Chalice turned into a blog on health care reform lately? A couple of reasons: A week doesn’t go by that I don’t hear another story about how our health care system is failing someone I know personally, causing  physical and financial hardship, not to mention the emotional and spiritual cost that I sometimes know about and sometimes don’t know about.  This doesn’t even take into account what I deal with as a minister of a congregation.  Another reason is that, this year, as last, I am going to be spending time blogging about some matters of the spirit on another website, this one connected to a new adult lifespan religious education program in my congregation, as well as another spirituality blog about my experience in spiritual direction (that I am writing anonymously).

The Struggle Continues

The struggle continues for reasonable, sane, affordable, health care for all citizens regardless of employment status, current health status, age or any other factor Americans and for-profit insurances companies can think of to discriminate among us.

The real victims of passing health care reform, especially a public option, national health plan?  Big Pharma and Insurance Companies. Will Ferrell and cast do a fantastic satire on Funny or Die.

I continue to speak out in favor of a public option to my Senator, John Cornyn, a man who seems to value everything I don’t.  I remember the days when Ted Kennedy was my Senator and, politically at least, it was like having myself as a senator. Now it’s like having my political opposite as a senator.  The things I value, based on my principles, in terms of human rights, health, education and social and public welfare, not to mention a host of other foreign and domestic policy issues seem to be represented in a photographic negative by my federal representatives, Mr. Cornyn, most of all.   Here’s Jay Rockefeller of West Virginia and John Cornyn of Texas arguing about who will be allowed to be left out of reforms applied to the health insurance industry:

If you live in Texas (or even if you live elsewhere) and believe that the only alternative to health care reform that ultimately lacks a viable public option is the status quo, give Senator John Cornyn’s office a call

Senator John Cornyn
Phone: 202-224-2934

If you call, maybe you could pretend actually be the Public Option, a neat little idea, I picked up from a MoveOn.org email addressed to me in the voice of the Public Option:

Hi, I’m the public health insurance option.

People have been saying all sorts of untrue things about me lately, so I decided it was time to stand up and set the record straight.

First off: the reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated. I’m happy and healthy. And I’m proud to play a starring role in four of the five health reform bills currently on the table.

Second: I have a lot of friends. President Obama and House Speaker Nancy Pelosi support me—as do 77% of the American people.1 In fact, I’m feeling pretty popular.

Senator you sit on the Senate Finance Committee, which is considering a “trigger” proposal that could kill me through indefinite delay.

A “trigger” that would make me wait to become available is just a trap designed to kill me. As Senator Charles Schumer has pointed out, “any reasonable criteria for triggering a public plan has already been met” because insurance companies have already failed to rein in costs and expand coverage.2

Here are some other things you might not know about me:

  • I like candlelit dinners, overseas travel, and long walks on the beach. Whoops, sorry—wrong email.
  • Some people say they don’t like me because I’m too expensive, but that’s just a flat-out lie. Keeping me around will actually save money—I’d cost 10% less than the typical private plan.3
  • I’m the best way to keep insurance companies honest. Like my friend Senator Jay Rockefeller has said, “Without the steady, positive influence of a public plan option in the marketplace, we will never truly solve the health care crisis in this country. Private health insurance has a long history of cutting people off or charging too much for too little.”4
  • Over 60 House progressives have publicly pledged to only vote for a bill that has me in it.5 So without me, health care reform doesn’t have enough votes make it through Congress.

1. “New Poll: 77 Percent Support ‘Choice’ Of Public Option,” The Huffington Post, August 20, 2009

2.“A ‘trigger’ for the public health insurance option? Already triggered.” NOW! Blog, May 20, 2009.

3. Letter to Rep. Charles B. Rangel, Congressional Budget Office, July 14, 2009

4. “Rockefeller Unveils Public Plan Option,” Office of Sen. Jay Rockefeller, June 10, 2009

5. “60 Members of Congress Say ‘No Public Plan, No Conference,’” Firedoglake, August 17, 2009

We Can’t Afford to Wait

My thanks to my friend Mary (once again) at Tensegrities for pointing to this awesome video compiled by MoveOn.org with REM’s You Are the Everything as soundtrack calling attention to the need for congress to ACT NOW to reform our broken health care system.

Check out the We Can’t Afford to Wait Vigils photos on flickr.

Check out the top 5 lies about health care reform and how to fight back.

After President Barack Obama’s address to congress last night, it’s imperative that everyone who supports real health care reform continue to contact their representatives and senators.

Find and contact your U.S. Representative here.

Find and contact your U. S. Senator here.

Unitarian Universalism prides itself on being tolerant and inclusive, but like most people and institutions the reality doesn’t live up to the vision.  Unitarian Universalsim talks big talk about being more multicultral and open to everyone, yet the reality is that Unitarian Universalism is a mostly white, mostly middle class, or even upper middle class religious movement, with its own set of values and its own culture.  Rev. Rosemary Bray McNatt spoke to this in her response to this year’s Berry Street Lecture at the UU ministers’ professional days gathering before General Assembly in Salt Lake City.  She basically said the reason our congregations are not more racially diverse is that becoming more diverse means changing our UU culture and when it gets right down to it, we’re really uncomfortable with that.

The current UU World cover story, “The Gospel of Inclusion,” is a story I wish more people were familar with both inside and outside Unitarian Universalist circles.  The story of how African American Pentecostal Bishop Carlton Pearson discovered Universalism, lost his mega church ministry because he was too accepting in his theology, met Rev. Marlin Lavanhar and landed his Higher Dimensions (later called New Dimensions) ministry at All Souls Unitarian Church in  Tulsa, where Pearson and what’s left of his congregation are now members holds many lessons.

The first lesson is that of Universalism.  It’s a grand lesson to revisit for Unitarian Universalists and a great idea for non-UU’s to be introduced to for the first time.  A loving God doesn’t send people to hell. Forever. Doesn’t make sense. It isn’t reasonable.

The second is the point made by Rev. McNatt at the Berry Street Lecture (and I paraphrase): UU Culture is keeping us from being multicultural.  From the UU World article, All Souls Tulsa before the influx of New Dimensions members:

The only problem: Everybody at this liberal church, with its hearty mix of humanists and theists, was really, really white. There were one or two brave souls of color, a few multiracial adoptive families, and periodically visitors who liked the message and the values but, after a few visits, said, “I’m just not sure my family is going to feel comfortable here.” All Souls just couldn’t seem to reach that critical mass of racial diversity.

In the spring of 2008 an opinion survey asked members what change they’d most like to see in the church. More than 90 percent said they wanted the church to be more diverse and multicultural, but there was no real plan to make it happen.

Here’s the reaction, according to the article, after the 11:30 a.m. Sunday service (the second of two services every Sunday) at All Souls incorporated the New Dimensions praise choir and band, and African American worship style, including a woman who welcomes people to worship with “Welcome to All Souls, the friendliest, trendiest, most radically inclusive church experience in Tulsa.” :

“The only hard thing for me is having the drum set and the God music,” says Julie Skye, an eleven-year All Souls member. “But I just change the words: I love the earth, the garden. There couldn’t be cooler people joining the church. But there’s something about the drums I just don’t like.”

But Brigid Kelley, a mother of six who grew up in the church and now teaches in the religious education program, thinks it’s great: “With all us young people, we need the power of the beat to bring us back to the energy of the earth. All this inclusion, I love it. We can’t be like a rock over here. We need to soften up, let some new ideas in.”

Lavanhar acknowledges that a portion of the congregation, mostly long-term members who are uncomfortable with the overtly theistic language of the music, may never embrace the new musical style at the 11 o’clock service. About seven people have told the board they are reducing or withdrawing their pledges because of the changes, he reports. And some people have stopped coming.

At the same time, about 125 new members have joined since last September, mostly younger people intrigued by the second service, and about one-quarter are people of color. Neighbors are complaining about a 17 percent increase in Sunday morning traffic over the past year, and the church has added two additional lots, because of all the visitors checking out All Souls.

Over the year, All Souls has fine-tuned the praise music: putting a sound-buffering tube on the drum set, working more UU songs into the praise mix, and paying attention to the God language.

At one point, Lavanhar mentioned to new associate music director Smith, “You know, the word Lord is going to be a little hard here.”

Smith looked puzzled. “You guys are so funny.” After all, services often start with “This is indeed a day which God has made” and end with a musical benediction, “May the Lord bless you and keep you.” The congregation sang “Jesus Christ Is Risen Today” out of the hymnal on Easter. The church’s statement of purpose, printed in the order of service each week, references “love of God” and “the essential gospel of Jesus.”

Another lesson I see reinforced in the All Souls/New Dimensions story is the importance of covenant over creed as the basis for forming religious communities.  When religious communities are formed on the basis of what people must agree to believe, it easy to damn others, to hell or otherwise, and set your group up as the holy righteous.  When communities are formed on the basis of right relationship and how they will treat each other and behave toward each other, and how they will restore relationship when and if broken, it is possible to disagree on matters of the spirit without being disagreeable.   This comes to light in the stories of real pain that surfaced for some people at All Souls when their UU church started looking like and feeling like a Christian church from their past that they left behind for the safety of Unitarian Universalism.

But behind the apparent contradiction, he discovered, was a very real pain and an opportunity for spiritual growth. Since last September, every week, a steady stream of men and women have come to talk with him about being abused—emotionally, sexually, or spiritually—as children in a Christian church. When they heard praise music sung, and saw the upraised hands, the trauma was reignited.

Over and over, he has heard his members say, “I came to All Souls to get away from all that.”

Each time he asks: What is the “that”?

“In most cases,” Lavanhar wrote in a recent issue of the church newsletter Simple Gifts, “people tell me it was authoritarian leadership, the dogma, the anti-intellectualism, the superstitious and magical thinking, the way women were treated, the homophobia, the guilt, the shame, the judgmentalism, the proselytizing, and the sense that their community was especially privileged with righteousness and truth, and the way that other traditions and ways of thinking were demonized. None of which, I point out, has been brought into All Souls.”

Unitarian Universalist churches do not have a test of belief. There is no creed, but a covenant, a way we behave toward one another.

“There is an African American experience of God,” Lavanhar has challenged members, “that has been molded and shaped by slavery, lynching, Jim Crow, and persistent racism. Many have an experience of God that involves Jesus. They don’t say it’s the only way. If we can’t accept that experience in our church, then we’re not living by what we say.

“Our history is filled with people rejected for their religious beliefs. That is something we share with them. We’re on this ship together. It’s full of excitement and possibility and also danger and risk. By living out our covenant and statement of purpose, it has forced us to change. It’s not forsaking Unitarian Universalism. It’s being Unitarian Universalist.”

There are many are lessons in this story including the every present, insidious, shape changing beast of racism, the can’t-be-overstated importance of being a welcoming congregation, and need to always, always practice radical hospitality.

No religious tradition  is perfect.  And yet, I am uplifted once again, and have hope again for the future of what Unitarian Universalism can be as I read about this story again.  This is a photograph of us in our Sunday best, a look at us being our best selves, and yet it’s so wonderful because it’s not air-brushed.


Listen to Heretics, an episode of the NPR program This American Life featuring Carlton Pearson.

Guess Who’s Coming to Worship General Assembly 2009 event with Marlin Lavanhar and Carlton Pearson.

All Souls Unitarian Church, Tulsa, OK

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